Now that we’ve seen golfers back on the beautiful fairways of Spring Valley Golf Course in Union Center, it feels like winter is truly behind us and some wonderful warm months are directly ahead.
In honor of the long-awaited start of the regular golfing season, an “old” high school buddy brightened my day with the following fairway facts that are hard to deny:
• Golf is actually the art of playing “fetch” with yourself.
• The reason that the pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can’t see him laughing.
• Why is it that you can hit a two-acre fairway 10% of the time and a two-inch branch 90% of the time?
• Golf is the adult version of an Easter egg hunt.
• The actual instructions for the game of golf include: Swing, swear, look for your ball …repeat!
• While taking her first golf lesson, a school teacher asked the pro, “Is the word spelled put or putt?” He very patiently replied, “Putt is correct. Put means to place a thing where you want it. Putt means a vain attempt to do the same thing!”
The recent Elementary School music concert was a wonderful evening of Disney songs performed by an energetic group of youngsters who appeared to be enjoying the music as much as their parents, relatives, and assorted family friends.
As usual, the high school gym was packed, with the parking lot backed up all the way to the baseball diamond.
The energy of the performers, mixed with the familiarity of the upbeat songs, put many a smile on the appreciative faces in the audience.
The entire show was just less than an hour and seemed more like 30 minutes. Of course, the cushions we brought along for our bleacher seats may have had something to do with that.
Our news story on the history of the Hillsboro Drive-In brought back a funny memory that may have been the quickest and sharpest verbal shot I have ever received.
More years ago than I care to admit, I covered sports for the Sentry Enterprise and really enjoyed it. One tactic that always helped was chatting with one of the players several days after the game to pick up a few “inside tips.”
While at the Drive-In one evening, I spotted Nick Hora, who was a key player for the Tiger football team at the time. I managed to corner him in a conversation about the last game and picked up some interesting facts for my story.
During this time, the waitress happened to walk by and I asked her what was taking so long for the chocolate malt I had ordered.
To this day, her explanation was the best personal squelch I have ever received.
“You’re talking to the malt maker,” she stated.
I have never forgotten that very appropriate retort, and never questioned a food order again. But, she was right. In my mind I was talking to a Tiger, and he was actually a “malt maker” at the time!