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Hello, Hillsboro: Brewers and Cubs are best and worst
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This is the year, I finally made good on my never-ending threat to can the Cubs and elevate the Brewers to the top spot in my personal baseball universe.

As I told my wife shortly before the season started, “There isn’t a reason in the world to continue being punished by the Wrigleyville Worms every season. I’ve  been a true, Cubby Blue fan since I was old enough to see games with my dad or later with buddies from school in the bleachers."

In all that time, they have not won any kind of world championship...or even come close, for that matter! In fact, they have gone the longest time without being a champion of any professional team, in any sport!  That pretty well paints the picture!

Players change, managers change, uniforms change, fans change, but it’s always the same climax. It’s called losing!

And, now, just to add to the insult of being an out-of-state Cubs fan, their long-time TV station, WGN, is splitting telecasts with Comsat Communications, a pay-TV network that somehow feels no guilt in charging people to watch a crew of losers play minor league style baseball in the major leagues.

So, this is the year of true change. I have even purchased a Brewers cap.
Fox Sports Wisconsin, bless them, televises just about all the Brewers games, with a shortened two-hour version later in the evenings.

I’ve tried to break from Knowles Cub tradition before, with varying levels of success. But this year, was definitely the Grand Slam decision of all time.

As this is being written, the amazing Brewers have the best record in Major League Baseball. Guess who has the worst! In fact, you don’t even have to guess. Who else but the legendary Chicago Flubs?

And I am parked in front of a Fox Sports Wisconsin broadcast, wearing my Brewers hat just about every game. I’m even thinking of buying the rest of the uniform!


Quick reminders:

Please don’t forget the Hillsboro Wesleyan Church Rummage Sale sponsored by Hope’s Cause, a local charity that offers financial and personal support to a school and orphanage in Liberia.

The sale will take place from 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. on Friday, May 2,  and from 8 a.m. to 2 p.m. on Saturday, May 3, in the lower level meeting room.

There will be a $5 bag sale at noon on Saturday.

Also, a special Run-Walk event will be held at the Hillsboro High School track on Saturday, May 3 at 3 p.m. to support Jonathon Munson, a 14-year-old Hillsboro youth who has been battling Phelan-McDermid Syndrome since he was 3-years-old. The rare disease can lead to autism or autism spectrum disorders.

A spaghetti dinner and silent auction will be held in the school cafeteria from 4 to 8 p.m., following the Walk-Run event. Tickets are $8 for adults and $4 for age 12 and under.

If you are unable to attend the event, a website has been created for on-line donations at


These are actual comments that were written on student report cards by teachers in the New York school system. All were reprimanded, but they sure have a sense of humor!

•  Since my last report, your child has reached rock bottom and has started to dig.

• Your child has delusions of adequacy.

• Your son sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them.

• The gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn’t coming.

Editor's Note: As of this writing, the Arizona Diamondbacks (8-22, .267) have the worst record in Major League Baseball. The Chicago Cubs (8-17, .320) are in fifth place in the National League Central, with that division's worst record.