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Hello Hillsboro: George Carlin knew how to live ...and to die
george carlin
George Carlin - photo by

I always get a kick out of reading humor based on the premise of “growing old gracefully.”

For one thing, the very title is a sure giveaway that the author is younger than he’s admitting or he wouldn’t announce publicly that he’s growing old at all!

My best buddy from high school (the guy who still played competitive baseball and basketball in his late 60s, and actually bragged about it!) sent me thoughts from the late George Carlin on “How to Stay Young.”

I couldn’t watch Carlin more than a half minute without breaking into laughter, and any of his brilliant thoughts, even on a more sensible note, are always worth hearing again.

It’s hard to argue with any of them!

• Throw out nonessential numbers. This includes age, weight, and height. Let the doctors worry about them. That is why you pay them.

• Keep only cheerful friends. The grouches pull you down.

• Learn more about computers, crafts, gardening, whatever, even smart phones. Never let the brain idle. An idle mind is the devil’s workshop. And the devil’s family name is Alzheimer’s!

• Laugh often, loud, and long, until you are gasping for breath.

• Surround yourself with what you love, whether it’s family, pets, keepsakes, music, plants, hobbies, whatever …and your home should always be your refuge!

• Cherish your health. If it is good, preserve it. If it is unstable, improve it. If it is beyond what you can improve, get help.

• Don’t take guilt trips. Take a trip to the mall, even to the next county or a foreign country....but not to where the guilt lives.

• Tell the people you love that you love them …at every opportunity, while it’s still available.

• Always remember that life is not measured by the number of breaths we took, but by the moments that took our breath away.

And, his last tip is definitely Carlin at his best.

• Life’s journey is not meant to arrive at the grave safely, in a well preserved condition …but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, and shouting, “Holy cow....what a ride!”